As we all know by now, I have been trying to get to talk to my kids for quite a while now. I have some important news to share with them and I feel that I cannot share this news with them in an e-mail, much less in an impersonal and unfeeling text message over the telephone. I much rather prefer to chat with them when I tell them the news of our pregnancy and the coming of their new sibling.
I am hoping to be able this way to properly gauge their reactions and find out how they really feel. With a text message or an e-mail they’ll be able to hide their true emotions. If I speak to them one on one I will be able to hear their voices and any changes in them. I surely would be able to tell if they were happy, disappointed, sad, angry, whatever….
After several angry text messages reprimanding Ranga, I finally managed to commit him to a time for a Skype chat. I must admit too that I was a little sneaky about this. You see, he had written to me that he wanted to have a year off after finishing school at the end of this year. A gap year. His timing for wanting Dad’s help was perfect as far as I was concerned. I let him know that I needed to talk to him about this and thinking he could better convince me, he obviously agreed. He he he he!!!!
So, FINALLY – last Saturday at around 8 in the morning Ranga and I started our chat. I immediately laid into him about his lack-lustre approach to staying in touch with me. Typically, he brushed me off with “… but Da-aaaaad, you know what it’s like. We are always busy. And then we forget. You know, it’s not like we have forgotten YOU! Or don’t LOVE you anymore…” and of course he knew he had me – AGAIN! What can I say? I’m a parent. I’m a parent that loves his kids. I’m a parent that thinks he understands his kids too. Well, at least a little.
And I was not that angry with him either. Unfortunately the younger one was still in bed. And I know that there is just about no way in hell of getting him up early on a weekend. So I told Ranga the news of his up-coming sibling’s arrival and he seemed genuinely happy. That was a huge load off my shoulders. I was a little concerned that there would be some jealousy, some resentment. There was none. I could hear in his voice that he was happy. You could hear the sincerity, too. What a wonderful kid he is! That really made my week!
The younger one did hear from me that evening, but of course he had heard from his older brother by then. He claimed to be happy, but unfortunately there was no way of knowing for sure. He is a little more sensitive than his brother, but I do think, feel that he did also mean it openly and honestly that he was happy. Now I can go ahead and tell the rest of the family. Oh, what a mission….!!!